The view from my Doctor’s office.
Usually the week after a treatment I feel much better and can get back to a pretty normal life. This time, not so much.
Last week was the fourth treatment since my surgery in January. My 11th treatment in total. I was making big plans for this week. Being the week before Easter and the kids are on spring break, there were so many things I wanted to do. Knitting, crafting, maybe even a trip to the Bronx Zoo.
Unfortunately, reality stepped in and reminded me I have a serious illness. Nothing major happened, I was checked thoroughly. My doctor just said it is fatigue. I’ve been through so much and even though this treatment has been easier than in the fall, I still have a long road ahead of me.
I have only two treatments left and will be done mid April. Then onto the test to see if the cancer is still gone. My doctor is great but she is definitely not the type that tells you that since everything looks good right now, you won’t be worse in six months. She is very honest, telling me we don’t know what will happen next but that we will figure it out together when something does happen. I like that.
Maybe that is what brought on the fatigue. Maybe it is depression, too. Not knowing if or when my cancer will come back. It’s so hard to make plans and that upsets me.
I haven’t really even knit much this week. I have things I want to make the kids for Easter but I just don’t know if I’ll get them done. There’s no create all night so it will be done for me like I used to do. If I can’t even do anything at home it also makes me wonder how I will hold a job eventually and how long before I can?
My iPad is my lifeline. Even when I don’t feel like moving, I always have something to do. From silly games to some new creative apps that I recently downloaded. I have so many ideas brewing in my head I was happy to find some apps to help me work on them. I have been sharing a lot of what I do on Instagram lately. You can find me here . One of these days I will figure out how to add all those links to the sidebar. Just not today. I’m on Pinterest and Twitter as well.
Anyway, I’m rambling now. I’ve rested the last few days and really want to finish a hand knit animal for each child and make Doctor Who bookmarks for them using transparencies before Sunday. I need to take some time this weekend to put together March Project Life. I have been doing some journaling cards throughout the month. And I really want to finish my sweater soon. The back and a little of the right side is all I have done so far. Most of my old hand knit sweaters don’t fit anymore since I’ve lost so much weight. I’m seriously not complaining about that but I miss my sweaters!
For now I’ll do what I’ve done all along and just keep going, appreciating every day that I have.
Created this in ArtRage app. The quote I used as an overlay was created by Elise Blaha Cripe